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Daughter Commits to Killing Infidels for Father’s Approval

“We will train you how to put (on a) suicide bomb jacket, and we will give you the target where you have to go, which country you have to go and everything we gonna arrange for you, and then you can just go there and just blow up yourself and then kill as many Christians you can do.”  

Zakhira was born to devout Muslim parents in the middle east. Her father was anticipating a son from Allah but was disappointed to get another daughter. He refused to give her a name or look at her for three days.

 “My father, he didn't look at me and he didn’t accept me as a daughter.” She remembers, “and it was very painful growing with this – it was just like, I had a rejection. And I was getting that pain that I was a rejected person.”

Zakira strived to be the best student and Muslim she could to gain her father’s love and approval.

“I did everything what I could do to make my father happy.  I was doing good in my school, in my education.” She states, “I never tried to bring shame for him, like talking with any boy, or doing anything which can bring his head down. So I always did my best to bring good for him.”

In her teens, her father became involved with an extremist Islamic group that met in their home, and Zakhira strived to excel in Islam as well.

“One day when they came in our home to teach about Islam and then they gave a call. They said, 'Whoever will give his or her life for Allah, Allah would repay back fully.' And also, the parents, they would go straight in heaven. So when he said these words that the parents will go straight in heaven, I thought, 'This is a time I can tell my father that, you know, how much I love him.' I raised my hand to be a Jihadist. I said, 'I will go for training.' And uh then my father, he looked at me, he was so happy, and he encouraged me, he said, 'Oh, I'm really proud of you that you're gonna do this.'"

She continues, “It was like uh honey to me. Because these were the words I really want to hear from years growing up.” 

She devoted herself to prayer before leaving her family for jihad training, but then one night she had a dream that changed her life.

She prayed, "Allah, you give me life. I'm gonna give you back by killing as many Jews and as many Christians to get the greater reward."

After that prayer she fell asleep, “I had a dream. In my dream, I'm in a graveyard, and searching for a way to come out. And everywhere is darkness. As I was searching for a way out, I saw one light man appear, and he called me Esther. I said, 'No, my name is not Esther.' And He said, 'Come and follow me.' I said, 'I don't want to follow you.' And the third time He said, 'My daughter, come and follow me.' And the third time I didn't deny. I just thought in my mind, 'Why this light man is calling me again and again? What he want to show me?' I said to myself, 'Oh, this light man is showing me a way to come out from this graveyard and from this darkness.' I quickly ran and followed the light. I was following, he stopped at one grave, and he said to someone, 'Come out.' And I saw a dead person came out. And I said, 'Who are you giving life to dead people?' He said, 'I am the way and the truth and the life.' These words, all of my life, from childhood to grownup, I never heard. 
I said, 'Please help me to come out from this graveyard, I don't want to stay here among dead.'"

Disturbed by the dream Zakhira delayed her jihad training. A few months later while escorting her mother for a hospital visit, she met John, a Christian who challenged her belief in the Qur’an.

Zakhira remembers their first conversation, “He said, 'Can your Islam give me salvation?' I said, 'Yes.' He said, 'I think you didn't read your Quran. And go and read your Quran first.' I said, 'No, I was young and I grown up, I read many times.' He said, 'Did you read in Quran Surah Ayat verse 9, where Allah said, to Muhammad, tell to your followers I don't know what will happen with you and what will happen with your followers?' So I came back home, and first thing I check in my Quran, it was same. That really disturbed me. I said, 'if the leader of Islam, Muhammad, he didn't know what will happen with him, what about us?'"

Zakhira’s doubts about the Qur’an stirred an intense interest the Bible, so she started visiting John daily to secretly read his copy. Then she asked him about her dream. 

“When I reached the Book of Esther, and I saw the name there, I said, 'Oh, this is the name light man called me.' John asked me, 'Which light man?' I said, 'I don't know. But one light man came to me,' and I shared all my dream with him. And when he heard that, he was in tears, and he said, 'You are not here because of my plan, you are here because of God's plan.' And he opened the Gospel Apostle John Chapter 14 verse 6, where Jesus Christ said, 'I am the way and the truth and the life.' That was the very day I said, 'Oh, He came to me.' And when I read myself in the Book of John those words which Jesus spoke to me in my dream, that day I accepted my Jesus as my personal savior. I was thinking I was so bad girl, I was going to kill His people, but He came to me and saved my life and my soul, too."

After commiting her life to Jesus, Zakhira changed her name to Esther. Because of her decision she faced harsh persecution from her father and eventually had to flee the country with John.  

With a smile she says, “I am so much thankful that among billion people, He looked at me and He called me 'daughter.'  Even my – when my own father was ashamed to accept me as a daughter. He called me, 'Daughter, come and follow me.'"

Today Esther & John are married and are safe in the United States.  Her amazing story is found in the book, Defying Jihad.

Warmly she says, “I was a merciless person. I was just like a wandering person. But becoming a Christian, it is world to me, it is life to me. And now I know that I have a shepherd, and I am His sheep. Earlier I had no care that I'm gonna kill people. But after I become a Christian, I feel even love for everyone.”

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