'I Was Seeing Devils Everywhere': Singer Fergie Opens Up about Her Personal Struggle and How She Found Redemption
Singer and songwriter Fergie Duhamel has achieved chart-topping success worldwide as female vocalist for The Black Eyed Peas.
However, her most recent solo work, a song entitled A Little Work, takes a look at the 42-year-old's struggle against her personal demons.
"I got to a point where I was seeing devils everywhere. Devil faces. Creatures that would appear to me and say 'fly, fly, fly.'" Fergie says in the song's music video.
"I would constantly be in the state of just listening to these characters, or these demons, or creatures – what they were going to tell me, what their messages were," she adds.
Fergie recalls a time when she almost had a panic attack in public.
"I was just going to lose it. I was about to start screaming at everybody on the street," she says.
That's when she saw her only source of hope – a church.
"I saw this church and there was nobody in there. I started to go through the different aisles and I started to pray," Fergie says.
She is seen in the music video barricading herself in the church and crossing herself as she approaches the altar.
Fergie, who says she takes her four-year-old son to church every Sunday, goes on to explain what happened.
"It was just this epiphany I had in this holy war. The war between good and evil, that good will always be more powerful," she says.
In the music video she has flashbacks of her late grandfather, who she says helped her overcome her demons.
"I had to really work hard at telling the visions, the spirits, to go away," she recalls. "I had to say it out loud – 'Leave me alone. I choose the good.'"
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Fergie walked out of the church a completely different person.
"That walk out of there, that demon that was there...it all of a sudden felt like it had lifted. It was almost like walking into the light," she says.
Despite her revelation, she says loving herself is still "a struggle."
Fergie and her actor husband, Josh Duhamel, have separated since the video was filmed.
