Explaining Difficult Situations to Children

Sometimes I try to remember how I felt as a young child when I would hear or witness scary events. I recall feeling confused and afraid. As an adult, I meditate on the word of God. 

II Tim 1: For God hat not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

I do this because I know it is important to focus on God, not what I can comprehend about a situation. I teach my children to do the same, to mediate on the word of God. Still, at times, what they see in this physical realm overwhelms them and brings them to tears.

This year has been such a difficult year for my family. My beloved aunt was diagnosed with lung cancer in late February.  The walk for her has been very difficult. Every day we say a prayer for her complete healing. My kids and I discuss how Jesus carries our sorrows and by His stripes we are healed.

Recently, we met my aunt at the pool. My seven-year-old daughter, Sage, was talking to her as she normally would, until my aunt removed her hat revealing her bald head. The cancer treatments have been rough and she has changed drastically.

Sage started to cry in a panic. I was embarrassed and upset by her behavior. I didn’t want my aunt to feel badly. I didn’t want her to think she was scaring my daughter who has always adored her. I knew then that I should of probably forewarned my daughter that my aunt’s appearance has changed.

When we got into the car, I talked to Sage about her reaction. She said something that left me stumped for a minute; “Mommy, if Jesus makes people better, why is Aunt Louise so sick?”

It is a question I have heard before. Many struggle with this question and they remain unbelievers as a result.

I reassured Sage that Jesus does heal. Even though it looks bad, the Lord Jesus is holding her, loves her and does not want her in this pain. He wants her healed and we need to pray for her during these difficult days.

If she is not healed from this, there is a reason beyond our understanding. God calls people home in His time.

All families will deal with tragedy. It cannot be avoided. But it is up to us, as Christian parents, to help our children learn how to deal with heartache.

Explain to your children that even though it does not look like our Lord is watching and hearing our fervent prayers, He is indeed.

I used an example of a friend of hers who recently had to have her tonsils removed to explain this to my daughter. It was a scary surgery for an eight-year-old girl. She did not want to go through with it, but her parents knew that in the long run this would benefit her. We never want our children to hurt. God does not want us to hurt. However, there are walks in life that we must go through.

During the surgery, her family stood on the word of God. They placed their daughter in His hands. Today, her friend is all better and feels great. Although it was painful to go through, it was worth it and the Lord was with her.

Yes, my beloved Aunt is very sick, and this is a difficult time for all of us. Even so, we need to trust God and mediate on the Truth. In these coming weeks, we will be mediating on Psalm 91.

I am trying hard to help my children comprehend that not all in this world is beautiful. There are trying circumstances we must go through.

Have you ever had to explain cancer or something scary to your child? How do you explain that while God loves us these things still happen?